Ch-ch-ch-Changes!

That’s like from a song and stuff. I don’t normally stutter, but well, things have been a bit odd around here in Tigers & Strawberriesland, and I wanted to let everyone know why, finally.

First of all, I stepped down as an editor on the Well Fed blogs The Paper Palate, and the new Food Bound. I hated having to do this, because I worked hard putting these blogs together, creating the writer’s guidelines, putting together a staff and working with the writers–as well as doing a good bit of writing myself, but I had to do it, because I didn’t think it was fair to the folks at Well Fed for me to continue, since big changes were coming my way.

It seems, that at the age of forty, I have become pregnant. This was not planned–but it is not unwelcome, either. In fact, two years ago, Zak and I had tried to get pregnant, and did, only to suffer a miscarriage at about ten weeks. This was a devastating experience (here is a clue–if a friend or a loved one suffers a miscarriage–don’t try to comfort her by saying, “You can always have another.” It isn’t comforting and it doesn’t help–just so you know), but we did try for a full year and a half to get me pregnant again to no avail.

We had given up.

And six months later, I became pregnant, much to our surprise. At first, I was terrified–because I was taking medication for a sleep disorder that I was afraid would affect fetal development. I stopped taking it immediately, and then found out from the doctors that we were probably fine, so long as I didn’t take the medication until after the baby was born and I was finished breast-feeding.

Then, I was nervous, because, well, women who have had miscarriages–well, we become wary creatures.

Now that I am entering the second trimester, and have seen ultrasounds of the baby and the placenta, all developing normally–well, I am finally happy and excited.

I’m going to be a Mom again.

And Zak is thrilled–he gets to be a Daddy, finally. Not just a stepdad, but a real, live, Daddy.

So–that is the big news.

Now you know why I have had trouble writing about food–because food and I, for about a month and a half–well, we were not on good terms. When I am pregnant, I don’t have morning sickness; I have morningnoonandnight sickness. And it is that kind of nausea where you just want to die, but you never, ever throw up. There is no relief. So, I cooked really bland, boring foods–things that would least upset my fragile equilibrium. And frankly, rice and mashed potatoes and all of those things–they are not much fun to read about three times a week.

Hence book reviews, essays and though-provoking posts that are sort of about food, but don’t require lots of cooking.

I was also really, really tired all of the time, so that is why I haven’t been as assiduous about posting every day.

Now, you know. The mystery is solved.

As for how this will change Tigers & Strawberries–I think it will only broaden the scope of what I write about. There is a lot to talk about when it comes to food, nutrition, pregnancy and children. Kids nutritional needs are different than adults, and I definately do have thoughts on this topic, and now have a perfectly good reason to start airing those thoughts.

But don’t worry. It won’t all be bodily functions, breastfeeding and baby talk from here on out.

Now that the nausea is beginning to subside (thank God–I was beginning to fear that it would continue into the fourth month like it did with Morganna), I will return to my usual adventurous cooking, and will get down to the business of writing my step by step lessons on how to stir fry tofu and chicken, as I promised long ago.

So, there you have it. I have ‘fessed up and the mystery is solved.

Cheers!

Now, I have to post this and turn off the computer, before the power goes out!

71 Comments

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  1. I knew it! That’s exactly what I thought it would be – as soon as you posted a couple of months ago that you had news but didn’t want to talk about it, I suspected, and then when you started talking about plainer foods, I knew exactly what was going on.

    Err, that might sound weird, but it was just an instinctual thing that I had.

    Congratulations! Such wonderful news :)

    Comment by Stephanie — April 14, 2006 #

  2. Congratulations! And thanks for sharing it with us – such wonderful news. A good friend of mine tried for ten years, had given up, and two years later, at the age of 38, found herself pregnant to her great surprise and joy.

    I wish you and your family all the best – and do keep us posted…
    :)

    Comment by Diane — April 14, 2006 #

  3. Congratulations!!!!!!!

    I hear you on that morningnoonandnight but never actually getting sick…that really stank. Ugh. Double Ugh.

    What wonderful news and congrats again!

    Comment by Jenn — April 14, 2006 #

  4. Awesome! With a 8 month old in our house, I look forward to hearing your take on all things edible for small people. We were in the south of France when our (now horrifyingly 7 yo) daughter was 7 months old, and were amazed at how many more flavors the French kids were given. “Pois et Canard pour les petits, apres huit mois” read one jar of baby food (Peas and Duck, for the infants, after 8 months) We dragged home quite a few jars, and went to work mashing up lots of things for our little, who responded with enthusiasm.

    Congrats, and enjoy!

    - David

    Comment by DavidNYC — April 14, 2006 #

  5. Oh Barbara, what a joy! I wish you the happiest and least barfy of pregnancies from here on out, a healthy little squirminator, and all of the wonderful attendant things.

    Welcome to the wild world of big-sisterhood, Morganna :)

    Comment by persimmon — April 14, 2006 #

  6. Oh my God Barb!!! Congrats!! I am so so so happy for you!! Take good care of yourself!! God bless you and the growing one! :o)

    Lotsa Love!

    Comment by Meena — April 14, 2006 #

  7. Barbara, congratulations! Wonderful, wonderful news.

    I wish you so much joy (and so little nausea). I’m looking forward to seeing how your thoughts on food change with this new change in your life.

    All the best to you and your family.

    Comment by Raspberry Sour — April 14, 2006 #

  8. Congratulations!!! wow, how exciting!!! I just couldn’t hold my silence anymore, and wish you the best! This baby is going to be so lucky to have such an awesome family…. plus innumrable kitty playmates to boot! I can totally see Grimmitch standing guard over the new one. =]

    I’ve been lurking here forever, ever since I jumped through a link from the simple recipe website. Your writing is so wonderful and informative, and so i just totally burned through all of your archives in the span of a week. >.

    Comment by berries — April 14, 2006 #

  9. Hooray!!

    I hope everything goes perfectly and your kid likes to sleep through the night. :)

    Comment by Sibyl — April 14, 2006 #

  10. Congratulations! Best wishes for a safe delivery, a healthy baby and very few sleepless nights. :-)

    Comment by Violet — April 14, 2006 #

  11. Yes! I thought so, and congratulations!

    Comment by Amy — April 14, 2006 #

  12. THAT’S SO AMAZINGLY COOL! YAY!!!

    Congratulations!

    Comment by Callisto Shampoo — April 14, 2006 #

  13. I’m delighted to hear this; I remember what happened the last time. Congratulations!

    (People who say “you can always have another” need to be stomped. They said that to me, and as you know, it was very definitely not true in my case.)

    Comment by Azalais Malfoy — April 14, 2006 #

  14. Like Stephanie, I suspected you were going to announce a new addition to your family. That blog awhile ago gave it away. I am very happy for you and your family. At dinner the other night Liz, my boss’ daughter, was telling us that she cooks all her baby’s food instead of buying baby food. She was having a hard time blending squash because she had to add water to blend it down. This, of course, made it too watery. I told her about your blog and the Sumeet (which still has not arrived….rrrrrgh) and promised to let her try it for her adorable baby named Zak. If you still have morning/night sickness you might try a ginger candy at Trader Joes. Can’t remember the name but it comes in a green-colored package and I usually find it hanging around the checkout lanes. Liz swore by this candy when she was pregnant as it helped the nausea. Congratulations on your news. It is exciting.

    Comment by Maureen — April 15, 2006 #

  15. Congratulations and the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy.

    Comment by Gillian — April 15, 2006 #

  16. Hi Barbara,
    Congratulations! What wonderful news.
    :-)

    Comment by Elise — April 15, 2006 #

  17. **smiling and waving**
    Best wishes for a healthy pregnancy and birth, amd much love to you all!

    Comment by Hadar — April 15, 2006 #

  18. Wow, congratulations! That’s awesome.

    Now I feel dumb about what I emailed you and asked you to do today. :) Please ignore it.

    I’m very happy for you.

    Comment by jen maiser — April 15, 2006 #

  19. I found you through LJ food_porn and I read all your posts beginning to end and have told many of my friends about you.

    I am so happy to hear about your new addition and will be excited to hear about how he adds “spice” to your life!

    (Oh, the ginger candy that Maureen is talking about above is probably from The Ginger People… my sweetie luuuuves this candy!)

    Comment by Shannon — April 15, 2006 #

  20. Many congratulations and blessings to you and your family!

    Comment by Jenna — April 15, 2006 #

  21. Congratulations!

    Comment by Ladylark — April 15, 2006 #

  22. Congratulations! Blessings upon you and yours. Thank you for sharing your wonderful news.

    Comment by Dan Jenkins — April 15, 2006 #

  23. Congratulations Barbara. Wishing you a happy healthy baby.

    Comment by Sally — April 15, 2006 #

  24. Congratulations, Barbara!

    Comment by mzn — April 15, 2006 #

  25. congratulations!

    Comment by ayun — April 15, 2006 #

  26. Congratulations! I’m looking forward to hearing your musings on children’s nutrition, since I have a current interest, one generation removed–I want my grandsons to like what I give them for dinner when they visit.

    Comment by lucette — April 15, 2006 #

  27. That’s great – of course I didn’t have a clue! All my best wishes to you all. My friend from England is staying with us this week, it was her 40th birthday on Thursday, and, well, I had imagined us drinking up a storm on her birthday (she is a champagne addict like me), but when she arrived off the plane she had a little bump. I was so excited for her, and we had to calm down the planned celebrations a little. (Well – the rest of us drank up a storm and she just watched!)

    It’s funny – cos I am 40 in a few weeks, and i definitely feel like I have missed the baby boat. I couldn’t imagine having a child myself now, I feel too old for that, and I have nothing but admiration for the women of my age who have the energy to go ahead with such a life-altering event.

    You go girl!
    wow.
    woo-hoo

    Comment by sam — April 15, 2006 #

  28. Yay, what a surprise! Reading your post gave me some hope. :)
    My heartfelt congratulations to you and Zak, Barbara!

    Comment by Indira — April 15, 2006 #

  29. Congratulations, Barbara! I’ll keep you and your pregnancy in my prayers.

    Comment by Amelia Sunderland — April 15, 2006 #

  30. Wow :) Congratulations & Best Wishes !
    Wish you a happy & healthy baby.

    Comment by Sonali — April 15, 2006 #

  31. Best wishes, Barbara. And I thought the news was going to be a move into reviewing in print as well as online :D

    Comment by Stephanie — April 15, 2006 #

  32. Of course, I wanted to stop in today (before heading out to a friend’s place in the country for a big romp in the woods, campout, make music around the campfire, and eat sort of event) and thank everyone for all of the good wishes.

    I am not surprised that some folks figured out my secret–I left some pretty strong hints–the very meditative entry where I cooked beef with ginger, soy and wine was the night I did the test, and was filled with fear that because of my medication, I had doomed the child to birth defects or death.

    Once I realized that was not the case, the sense of utter doom lifted, but, again, after the miscarriage, I was still not very hopeful that this one would be able to be carried to term.

    Then, we had moments of tense worry when we thought I was miscarrying–but now that I am finally easing into the second trimester, finally, we are starting to relax and enjoy the sense of hope and joy that a new life may bring.

    I will come back and answer some of these posts individually–some of you had some wonderful things to say and I want to thank you all.

    Its just that I have to start gathering camp chairs, the cooler, and the food and all of the stuff we are hauling out to the event.

    Thank you all again.

    And one last thing–never give up hope.

    Blessings to you all.

    Comment by Barbara — April 15, 2006 #

  33. CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU AND ZAK. This is wonderful news Barbara. And all the time I thought you just wanted to encourage our reading habits :-) Good to know the sickness phase has passed. Take care

    Comment by Ashwini — April 15, 2006 #

  34. Heya – good news! Tell me if you put up an Amazon Baby Gift List or something.

    Noddy

    Comment by Noddy — April 15, 2006 #

  35. yay! congratulations to you and zak and morganna :)

    Comment by ashley — April 15, 2006 #

  36. Hi Barbara,

    I’ve been a silent visitor to your blog for a long time now. But such wonderful news, I had to break the silence.
    Congratulations!!! and you are right, the food blog can only get better with the addition of baby’s cuisine!!!!
    Been there, doing that!…
    Take Care…

    Comment by Vee — April 15, 2006 #

  37. :)

    Congratulations and all the best.

    j

    Comment by jasmine — April 15, 2006 #

  38. Hi Barbara – Mucho congrads to you!!!! I’m sure that whatever you post on in the future will be just as interesting and well thought out as all your other wonderful posts.

    Comment by Kirk — April 15, 2006 #

  39. How thrilling! I hope that this coming summer won’t be a scorcher. I gather that can be most uncomfortable when one is carrying around a baby inside!! All the best!

    -Elizabeth

    Comment by ejm — April 15, 2006 #

  40. w00p!! Congrats!! :)

    Comment by Bastlynn — April 15, 2006 #

  41. this is just terrific news for both of you! making room for this new life in your life is muy muy exciting. as someone who is at your same age and who most likely has missed the baby train I applaud you! Yippee!

    Comment by Jeanne — April 15, 2006 #

  42. Congrtulations Barbara
    That is wonderful news :)

    xxx

    Comment by clare eats — April 15, 2006 #

  43. Thank you, thank you, everyone. I am very excited. A little nervous, too, since I have been summarily informed that once the baby emerges, it’s all mine!

    In any event, I will be sure to do my duty taking care of mom & baby, so that the former can continue to post regularly, and the latter can grow into a happy, healthy food-lover.

    Comment by Zak — April 16, 2006 #

  44. Woah, congratulations! What a bombshell. Good luck to both you and Zak! Careful not to spoil him/her with food _too_ delicious. :)

    Allen

    Comment by Allen Wong — April 16, 2006 #

  45. How wonderful for you!!! Congratulations again and again.

    Comment by Sher — April 16, 2006 #

  46. What great news, Barbara. Congratulations.

    Comment by dejamo — April 16, 2006 #

  47. Tiger cubs and tiny wild strawberries. Hooray!

    Comment by lindy — April 16, 2006 #

  48. Up next: baby blogging! This is wonderful news, a wonderful lifeturn!

    Comment by Alanna — April 16, 2006 #

  49. Congrats! OoOo, fresh baby smell.

    xo

    Comment by Dr. Biggles — April 16, 2006 #

  50. Congratulations :)

    Just yesterday some old time Athens friends visited who I haven’t seen in at least a decade. We got to talking about food(and Chicago eats in particular). They filled me in on the growing pains of my alma mater. They’ve lived in the town for years and years.
    Anyway, I mentioned your blog. Perhaps you have new readers. :)

    Comment by Christopher Gordon — April 16, 2006 #

  51. WOW! What wonderful news!! I am very happy for you.

    Take care of your tummy. I have this type of all day sickness when I am “with child”. Baked potatoes were the only food I could eat for a few months.

    Comment by Tatyanna — April 16, 2006 #

  52. Congratulations, Barbara! Best wishes to the whole family! :-)

    Comment by mrs D — April 16, 2006 #

  53. congrats congrats! ;)

    Comment by andrea — April 16, 2006 #

  54. Congradulations! That is wonderful news!

    My aunt had her first at 40 and her second at 43 and she loved being a mom at that age. I am sure you will do wonderfully!

    Comment by Kitarra — April 16, 2006 #

  55. How wonderful for you Barbara,congratulations! May you be filled with peace and serenity for the rest of your pregnancy.
    First I envied your renovated kitchen and now I envy you, for I also fear that I have missed the baby train.

    Comment by Connie — April 16, 2006 #

  56. Dear Barbara,
    Best of wishes and congratulations! I was worried for you when you posted the beef entry and I am relieved to hear that you’re ok. I’m so happy for you and Zak and Morganna. Take great care and let me know if you need any of those soups ok?

    Comment by Shirley Lim — April 17, 2006 #

  57. Congratulations, that is wonderful news indeed! :)

    Comment by Anne — April 17, 2006 #

  58. Congrats.Have a happy motherhood journey.

    Comment by ramya — April 17, 2006 #

  59. CONGRATS!!!!

    The best of wishes to you and your family!

    Comment by matt armendariz — April 17, 2006 #

  60. Congratulations!!!

    Comment by Castiron — April 17, 2006 #

  61. Wow, what a honest post, Barbara. First off, FELICIDADES… and I hope you’ll stay strong, healthy and happy while you wait for baby to arrive. Here’s a toast to motherhood, nappies, and baby food!

    Comment by Kel — April 17, 2006 #

  62. Congratulations!

    Comment by Erin — April 17, 2006 #

  63. Congrats!

    Comment by sprite — April 17, 2006 #

  64. Hi Barbara,
    Congrats.Take care of ur health.
    Vineela

    Comment by vineela krishna — April 17, 2006 #

  65. Oh Barbara!That’s such wonderful news.I am so happy for you.Congratulations to you and Zak.Take care!

    Comment by sailaja — April 18, 2006 #

  66. Congrats! How wonderful for your whole family! I’m looking forward to hearing more.

    Comment by Erika — April 18, 2006 #

  67. Wow–thank you everyone! Your love and support and well-wishes all mean a great deal to me here.

    I wanted to answer a few of you personally, too–but if I miss you, it is probably because of the high number of posts here. But even if I don’t mention you by name–your words still touched Zak, Morganna and I very deeply, and we all very much appreciate it and thank you for them.

    David–have no fear–I will definately post recipes and thoughts on feeding the small ones! And kudos to you for mashing up goodies for your kids to eat!

    Berries–thank you for de-lurking! I do like to meet my readers–they very often become my friends. I am glad to hear that you have read my archives and liked them–I will try hard to keep up with writing more good stuff for you to read in the coming months and years!

    Azalais: I am so with you on the stomping. A lot of times, people don’t know what to say when confronted with a miscarriage, and generally, I think that when they say, “You can always have another one,” they mean well. But, well–and your case is always one that comes to mind to me–it isn’t always true, and even if it is true–it doesn’t acknowledge the very real grief the mother is having -right now-. And that grief takes time to get through, and saying something like, “Oh you can always have another baby,” is tantamount to patting the woman on the head and saying, “Oh, this baby doesn’t matter, and neither do your feelings, because they aren’t real.” That isn’t what people mean, but that is often what it feels like.

    So my advice to everyone on the issue of what to say to someone who is grieving because of miscarriage–if you don’t know what to say, then honesty is the best policy. Say, “I don’t know what to say, except that what you are going through is something I cannot imagine, but I want you to know that I love you and I am here for you in whatever capacity you need me.”

    And then be quiet. Say nothing else, and certainly not anything that can come across as so callous as, “You can always have another baby,” lest you be stomped.

    Maureen–I went with real ginger ale, fresh ginger and pickled ginger for the nausea–it all worked like a charm.

    Jen M. Fear not–I will be betatesting for you after I catch up with my blog here. It was a crazy busy week last week… And no worries–it is no big deal!

    Sam–it seems to be a family tradition with the Fishers and Perks clan. There have always been a handful of us who extend motherhood to forty and beyond and do well with it. If the truth is known–I am probably healthier than I was when I had Morganna in my twenties–certainly I am in a better, more stable place in my life. As for energy–well, I am not looking forward to losing lots of sleep, but then, no one does!

    Hey, Cousin Ashley–be sure and tell your Grandma and Mom about the news!

    Vee–I am glad you de-lurked! Thank you for the congratulations.

    Allen, dear–I think that the child is destined to be spoiled from food too delicious. ;-) But that is a good way to be spoiled, isn’t it?

    Tatyanna–most of the nausea is gone. Thankfully. It is most horrid. And yes, potatoes are one of the few foods that is perennially appetizing when I am sick like that.

    Hey, Christopher–thanks for mentioning my blog! I don’t know how many folks here in Athens even know that I blog here….

    Kitarra–that is good to hear–in truth, I am a little nervous because of my age, but now that I am over the nausea, I am feeling much better, so I am much more positive.

    Shirley–I will definately want some of those soup recipes–and Indira–that spice that is good for mothers after delivery–I will want to know about that, too.

    And Indira–I want to tell you not to give up hope, ever–except that I became pregnant after I gave up.

    Maybe it is because I relaxed after I gave up? I don’t know, but hope without stressing may be the middle path that I was missing when I was trying so hard to get pregnant after the miscarriage.

    It may also be that my body needed a year and a half to heal–and it took its time, as it needed to do.

    To everyone else–thank you so much. And much love to you all as well….

    Comment by Barbara — April 18, 2006 #

  68. Barbara, Congratulations and good luck. I havent been here for the past few days. Blame it on the growing number of blogs :-) but this good news was a warm welcome to me. Do take care of yourself and the little one :-)

    Comment by Kerala Girl — April 19, 2006 #

  69. Barbara – the ginger candy I could not remember the name of is Ginger Chews by the Ginger People which states on the green package “American’s #1 selling ginger candy”. Trader Joes carries this product. At my house it is the cure for upset tummies, spicing hot chocolate, seasickness, sore throat and just generally good nibbling.

    Comment by Maureen — April 19, 2006 #

  70. congrats! i just wanted to let you and morganna know that me and my sisters are far apart in age– my littlest sister was born when i was sixteen. she is now five (i also have sisters ages 11 and 13), and one of the greatest joys in my life– we are great friends, and yes, we fight just like real sisters! big sister is my favorite title!
    love, anna

    Comment by Anna — April 19, 2006 #

  71. I was out of town, away from blogreading when this was first posted – so this is late, but you’re still pregnant, so congratulations!

    Comment by Tricia — April 28, 2006 #

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